Saturday, April 07, 2007

Too stupid to live!

Okay, from the title, you may assume that I am going to rant about someone that did something really. really, really stupid. I am. Unfortunately, the stupid idiot I am going to rant about is me.

What, pray tell, stupid thing did I do? Well, let me tell you. We got a really cold snap here in North Texas. Sue and I had picked up a bunch of scrap wood and twigs on our walks around the neighborhood over the last few weeks, and decided to have a fire tonight. A couple of the pieces of wood that Sue had brought into the house were a bit too long to put in the fireplace, so I took them out into the garage to cut or break them. One piece was particularly brittle, so I figured that I could just break it by leaning it up against something and using my foot to break it in the middle.

Here is where the stupidity comes in. I have been using an empty Kitty Litter container, as a platform to saw these pieces of wood. Initially, I planned to lean the one piece against the container, and snap it in the middle with my foot.

Then I got the oh so brilliant idea to stand one foot on the wood on top of the container, and use my other foot to break the wood. Remember, I told you this container was empty!

Naturally, as soon as I put my weight on the wood and the top of the empty container, and picked up my other foot to break the wood, the container did two things pretty much simultaneously,. It crumpled from my weight, and went flying out from under me. All I could think of as I was going down was... "Shit, that was really pretty freakin' stupid!"
In fact after I hit, and I was trying to assess whether I had broken anything other than the container, and my pride, I believe I said just that! Sue heard the thud, and my "Oh shit, that was really stupid!" from the garage. She came out, and found me standing, clutching my arm, and looked at me as if to say... You guessed it. "Well, that was really pretty stupid!" And it really was.

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